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Indian Romance Goes Mobile Melvin Durai Melvin Durai is an Indiana-based writer and humorist. Born in Tamil Nadu, India, he grew up in Zambia and moved to the U.S. in the early 1980s. In 1995, while working as a reporter for a daily newspaper in Chambersburg, Pa., he began writing a regular humor column. His weekly column now appears in several newspapers and on a number of Web sites. He also writes a twice-monthly column on Indian and Indian-American issues. He is a diehard fan of the National Football League and also likes to run, lift weights and play soccer, tennis and pool. An award-winning feature writer and aspiring novelist, he plans to publish a collection of his best columns. You can write to him at comments@melvindurai.com To read his older columns, go to http://www.melvindurai.com

My wife and I have been married for more than two years, but, unlike many couples in India, we still haven't engaged in SMS. It's not that we're too old-fashioned for it. We just don't have the right equipment.

SMS, in case you didn't know, is nothing kinky. It stands for Short Messaging System (also known as text messaging), an inexpensive and increasingly popular way of communicating for mobile phone users in India. According to a recent India Today article, about 2.5 crore SMS messages are sent daily, some traveling many miles, others just a few yards.

Wife: "Y r u not cming to bed?"

Husband: "Crckt mtch. Gd nght!"

If you had trouble reading some of those words, you're probably not used to SMS, which has given many Indians the opportunity to butcher English like never before. Forget spelling, forget punctuation, forget the lecture your English teacher gave you when you said, "I am not understanding why grammar be important?"

Anything goes in SMS, as long as people can make sense of your msg (message). It's easy to be misunderstood. When a woman writes, "U gv me lc," her message can compliment one man ("I always give people luck!"), confuse another ("I don't remember giving you lace.") and upset a third ("I'm really sorry, dear. I didn't mean to give you lice!").

What's most remarkable about SMS is its role in romance. Couples are using SMS not just to keep in touch, but to express affection for each other. Sometimes it takes just three letters ("Lv u"), other times it takes as many as 35 ("Lv u so vry mch. Almst as mch as I lv Hrthk Rshn.")

SMS has allowed some couples to be more intimate, to loosen whatever restraints their culture and upbringing have imposed on them. Even a simple "thnkng abt u" can put a smile on a wife's face, allowing her to feel closer to her husband and look forward to seeing him again, as soon as the Test series is over

But SMS isn't just for established couples. Like an Internet chat room, the tiny screen of a mobile handset allows you to flirt with people you barely know. You might be too shy to speak to the cute co-worker in the opposite cubicle, but you can easily write your feelings: "I thnk I'm fllng n lv wth u. Whts ur nm agn?"

SMS can't be monitored by your boss, which means you won't be reprimanded for consulting your spouse about a critical issue: "Whch Amtbh mvie shld we c tnight?"

Indeed, SMS is so private, you can read messages from your boyfriend while doing something important, such as having dinner with your husband. But try to avoid such situations, unless you're desperate for some good SMS.

Unfortunately, my wife and I can't engage in SMS because we have only one mobile phone. That means we have to settle for the old way of communicating: email.

For an email subscription to Melvin's regular weekly columns (not the ones that appear here), go to www.MelvinDurai.com

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