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International Women's Day Special
International Women's Day Poetry International Women's Day Special

Monday, March 20, 2000
Memo from a Child to: Parents
Sawf

After reading the memo, those of us with grown up children may feel the guilt of having erred. Younger parents may keep this as a guide for when their children are growing up.

This is uncopyrighted material of unknown origin that appeared in an advertisement in the NYT of 17th March 2000.

Myara Asif

  1. Don't spoil me. I know quite well that I ought not to have all I ask for - I'm only testing you.
  2. Don't be afraid to be firm with me. I prefer it, it makes me feel secure.
  3. Don't let me form bad habits. I have to rely on you to detect them in the early stages.
  4. Don't make me feel smaller than I am. It only makes me behave stupidly "big".
  5. Don't correct me in front of people if you can help it. I will take much more notice if you talk quietly to me in private.
  6. Don't make me feel that my mistakes are sins. It upsets my sense of values.
  7. Don't protect me from consequences. I need to learn the painful way sometimes.
  8. Don't be upset when I say, "I hate you". Sometimes it isn't you I hate but your power to thwart me.
  9. Don't take too much notice of my small ailments. Sometimes they get me the attention I need.
  10. Don't nag. If you do, I shall have to protect myself by appearing deaf.
  11. Don't forget that I cannot explain myself as well as I should like. That is why I am not always accurate.
  12. Don't put me off when I ask questions. If you do you will find that I'll stop asking and I'll seek my information elsewhere.
  13. Don't be inconsistent. That completely confuses me and makes me loose faith in you.
  14. Don't tell me my fears are silly. They are terribly real and you can do much to reassure me if you try to understand.
  15. Don't ever suggest that you are perfect or infallible. It gives me too great a shock when I discover that you are neither.
  16. Don't ever think that it is beneath your dignity to apologise to me. An honest apology makes me surprisingly warm towards you.
  17. Don't forget that I love experimenting. I couldn't get along without it, so please put up with it.
  18. Don't forget how quickly I am growing up. It must be very difficult for you to keep pace with me but please do try.
  19. Don't forget that I don't thrive without lots of love and understanding, but I don't need to tell yo, do I?
  20. Please keep yourself fit and healthy. I need you.