Monday, March 4 2002
Did An Indian Compete In Salt Lake City?
Melvin DuraiMelvin Durai is an Indiana-based writer and humorist. Born in Tamil Nadu, India, he grew up in Zambia and moved to the U.S. in the early 1980s. In 1995, while working as a reporter for a daily newspaper in Chambersburg, Pa., he began writing a regular humor column. His weekly column now appears in several newspapers and on a number of Web sites. He also writes a twice-monthly column on Indian and Indian-American issues. He is a diehard fan of the National Football League and also likes to run, lift weights and play soccer, tennis and pool. An award-winning feature writer and aspiring novelist, he plans to publish a collection of his best columns. You can write to him at comments@melvindurai.com To read his older columns, go to http://www.melvindurai.com
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During breakfast the other day, a friend and I discussed the
2002 Winter Olympics in Salt Lake City.
"What did you think of them?" he asked.
"I didn't really watch them," I replied. "Just looking at
snow and ice makes me feel cold."
"Then you missed the Indian man who competed in the luge."
I was so stunned, I dropped my idli. I tried to catch my
breath. "An Indian man? In the luge? That can't be. Are you
sure he was an Indian from India? There isn't much snow in
India, you know. Perhaps he was Native American. Or maybe he
was West Indian. You've heard about the Jamaican bobsled
team, haven't you?"
"Yes, I've heard of them. But I'm pretty certain he was from
India. He was waving the Indian flag at the opening
ceremony."
"Really?" I asked, taking a sip of water. "That can't be.
Did someone give him the wrong flag by mistake? Perhaps
the airline mixed up his luggage. It's been known to
happen."
"No, I don't think it was a mix-up. Besides, his name was
Shiva Keshavan. That's got to be an Indian name."
"Yes, that's an Indian name," I acknowledged. "But perhaps
one of those Jamaicans converted to Hinduism. It's been
known to happen. Aren't there a few Hindu temples in
Jamaica?"
"No, I don't think he was a convert. Besides, the TV
announcer said he was from the Himalayas."
"The Himalayas?" I asked. "Then Shiva Keshavan must have
been from Tibet. Or maybe he was from Nepal. Some of those
Nepalis can really ski. Nepal even has an army that fights
on skis. As their enemies have discovered, ski poles can be
really sharp. That's why Amnesty International wants to
outlaw military skiing."
"No, I don't think he was from Tibet or Nepal. The
announcer said he was representing more than one billion
people."
"More than one billion people?" I asked. "Ah, it's beginning
to make sense to me. Shiva Keshavan must have been from
China. A Chinese man who trains in Tibet. He must have
converted to Hinduism and got his luggage mixed up. That's
it! I've figured it out, haven't I?"
"You haven't explained the Indian part. Why did the TV
announcer call him an Indian?"
"You're right," I said, scratching my head. "This is a real
puzzler."
"The announcer said that India has competed in the Winter
Olympics six times."
"India? Six times? Are you sure he meant India, the country?
Perhaps he was talking about a female athlete named India.
India is an increasingly common name among girls, you know.
I wouldn't be surprised if there's a figure skater named
India."
"Well, if he was talking about a figure skater named India,
I feel sorry for her. After six trips to the Winter
Olympics, she hasn't won a single medal."
"But at least she keeps trying. At least she's persistent.
You've got to admire her for that. And what about Shiva
Keshavan? How did he do?"
"Quite well, actually. He didn't win a medal, but he
finished 33rd in a field of 48."
"He beat 15 other contestants?" I asked, dropping another
idli. "Wow! That's amazing. Terrific. Are you sure he was
from India?"
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