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Monday, Jan 28 2002
Once An Indian Always An Indian
Melvin Durai

Melvin Durai is an Indiana-based writer and humorist. Born in Tamil Nadu, India, he grew up in Zambia and moved to the U.S. in the early 1980s. In 1995, while working as a reporter for a daily newspaper in Chambersburg, Pa., he began writing a regular humor column. His weekly column now appears in several newspapers and on a number of Web sites. He also writes a twice-monthly column on Indian and Indian-American issues. He is a diehard fan of the National Football League and also likes to run, lift weights and play soccer, tennis and pool. An award-winning feature writer and aspiring novelist, he plans to publish a collection of his best columns. You can write to him at comments@melvindurai.com To read his older columns, go to http://www.melvindurai.com

Indians around the world got some good news recently: The Indian government had finally agreed to allow dual citizenship. Minutes after hearing the news, thousands of Non-Resident Indians dispatched telegrams to their parents and grandparents in India, saying, "Remember that plot of land I couldn't inherit before? Don't give it to anyone!"

Dual citizenship will allow NRIs to not only inherit property and invest in the market, but also travel to India without visas. In other words, they won't have to visit the Indian Embassy, saving themselves at least one full day of time and one full bottle of aspirin.

But perhaps the biggest advantage of dual citizenship is intangible: It will allow Indians living abroad to still feel part of their motherland while pledging allegiance to their adoptive countries. An Indian native serving in the U.S. Army, for example, will not have to feel guilty about his favorite hobby: throwing darts at a picture of Pervez Musharraf.

Corporal Smith: "Hey Corporal Gupta, why are you throwing darts at General Musharraf? Don't you know that Pakistan and America are rather friendly nowadays?"

Corporal Gupta: "Yes, I know that. As you can see, it is only my right hand that is throwing darts at the general. The rest of my body is wishing him well."

Dual citizenship adds an official seal to what I have long believed: Once an Indian, always an Indian. No matter how hard they might try, Indians living abroad cannot wash their Indianness away.

Husband: "It won't go away. I can't wash my Indianness away."

Wife: "What soap are you using?"

Husband: "Lux. Imported from India. I bought it at Patel Brothers Store."

Wife: "Why don't you try Chandrika ayurvedic soap? It works well."

Indeed, Indians abroad have an insatiable appetite for Indian products, including Lux soap, Amul cheese, Parachute coconut oil, and Hrithik Roshan. Weekly newspapers offer them news from India, keeping them informed about the latest government scandal.

If you still doubt the loyalty of NRIs, just observe how enthusiastically they celebrate India's Independence Day, whether they live in Chicago, Houston, Toronto or London. "Independence Day! Independence Day!" the Indians in London shout, as they dance in merriment. "Thank goodness we got rid of the British!"

On Aug. 15, India's Independence Day, Indians in America participate in parades, feasts and dances. On July 4, America's Independence Day, they participate in watching TV. And perhaps some carom board, too.

Before Sept. 11, many Indian business owners in America emphasized their Indianness to attract customers. "Namaste," they said. "Are you interested in buying some chapattis?" After Sept. 11, they were quick to emphasize their Americanness. "What's up, man? Wanna buy some flat bread?"

Partly to protect their businesses from vandalism, business owners displayed more American flags than a July 4th parade. "We're as American as you," they said. "Even our turbans are red, white and blue."

Yes, they are American, and yes, they are Indian. Dual citizenship will help them hang onto that mixed identity. And just as important, it will help them hang onto that bungalow in India.

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